Embracing What Makes You Unique

Her Own Beat’s Note: I’m posing these questions as an extension of my post, Redefining Yourself. I became interested in knowing what others were doing. 

What makes you unique? What makes you stand out? Share how you embrace what makes you unique. How do you march to your own beat?

Saving Our Girls

My heart aches for our girls on a daily basis. In the past month, we have heard of two major beatings with deadly consequences. The first was the untimely death of 16-year-old Wilmington teenager Amy Joyner-Francis, and the second was the sad death of 17-year-old Brooklyn teenager Ta’Jae Warner. No matter what the circumstances were that led up to these fights, I know one thing. It was not worth it. Two young ladies are dead, and many others are facing time in prison.

We have to come to place where our girls understand that fighting is not worth it. They need to learn to love themselves enough to walk away. A split-second decision can have life-changing consequences. We need our girls to understand their value…their true worth. A boy isn’t worth it. An Instagram post isn’t worth it. A side eye…a look (or lack thereof)…shade. None of it is worth it.

How can we get our girls to understand that it’s not worth it? By truly developing and building their self-worth and self-confidence…their true self. For the past few years, the country has focused on the boys and building them up. President Obama even launched the initiative called My Brother’s Keeper. Yet, I feel that our girls have been left behind. Not as many people seem to be concerned about their outcomes because, oftentimes, their issues are shadowed by their male peers, but I hope the tables are turning. In March, the Congressional Caucus on Black Women and Girls was announced, and it is supposed to focus on the barriers faced by Black women and girls. However, it may be years before we see the impact of that caucus.

Therefore, we must take it upon ourselves to rebuild our community and our girls. This goes beyond each one, teach one. Why not teach two or three so that no girl is left behind? I know that I can’t do it by myself, but I can do it with a legion of motivators, galvanizers, conquerors, leaders, and builders. Together, we can build their self-worth, and our girls will be able to discover their true selves.

Not Everyone’s Cup of Tea

Image from Phat Girl Fresh

Repost from Phat Girl Fresh:

Guess what ladies, the world doesn’t end because you have haters and naysayers. You will never be everyone’s cup of tea and the truth is, this shouldn’t bother you if you aren’t offering them a sip! #phatgirlfresh #ijs #curvyconfidence #goldenconfidence #fatgirlsbewinning #phatgirlbouteeque #phatgirlgear

The Ugliness of Photoshopping 

Generally, I would be singing the praises of a mainstream magazine featuring a black actress, more specifically a brown-skinned actress, on the cover. I’m forever promoting the need for diversity within mainstream diversity. Yet, I was taken aback, when I saw the cover of ADWEEK featuring Kerry Washington. One Facebook poster said it perfectly, Kerry looked like a black Scarlett Johansson.

I was sick to my stomach. I wish more covers would show the true beauty of our stars. I understand Photoshopping, but not when the person no longer looks recognizable. Kerry Washington will always be beautiful because her inner beauty radiates all the way through. I hope one day that this need for Photoshopping will end. It creates an unrealistic perspective of beauty for our children. Let us celebrate our true beauty.
Be sure to read Kerry’s response and disbelief about not recognizing herself on posted Facebook.